S5E8-QuinysValorn

Quinys Forgedawn

Quin heads down to the bar, mind heavy with the recent revelation with Edric. He liked her? What did that even mean? She knew he wanted her, because he kissed her, but he liked her? As a person? She saw Valorn at the bar and sat close to him, ordering a shot of whatever and pulling her hair back into a braid. "Thinking or drinking?"

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn had become a bit more solemn over the past day, and he was just keeping to himself. When he saw Quinys, he was glad to see her, but was reminded that he hadn't spent much time personally with half of the party. He heard her question and laughed a bit, bringing the cup to his mouth. "Thinking, lass. Thinking, certainly. Thinking about all too much. Trying to forget, honestly. You?"

Quinys Forgedawn

"I've found drinking is the cure for thinking." Quin sipped her glass of dark brown liquid and sighed, trying to push away the thoughts of everything in the last week. There was so much she didn't quite get, and she wanted to argue, but who knew…what if everyone else was right?

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn wasn't sure what she literally meant, but he felt her every word. He knew he shouldn't fall into despair so close to his wife's birthday, but this was about the time for it. He looked Quinys in the eyes for a moment, leaving his mug on the table. "Quinys, have you ever felt a certain… hopelessness in regards to your greatest love? Have you ever felt so desperate and lacking of hope that you just wanted to hide yourself away in a corner and never leave it?" Valorn realized his tone was shakier than normal, and he was saying worrying things. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to scare you. I just am dealing with quite a bit at the moment." He took another drink.

Quinys Forgedawn

Quin swallows down the last of her drink, and licks her lips, waving for another and looking Valorn over. What did he mean by 'greatest love'? Her greatest love was Adonis, he was the the best thing that had happened and everyone hated her for him. How does one even feel about that? "I've hated myself for love, and I guess hopelessness could describe it. But I've never been 'in love' in the way that people love, I've just existed."

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn finished his, and decided he probably shouldn't grab another. "What d'ya mean, lass? Existed? You mean you've never felt love in your bones, making you feel warm and safe? How does love take shape in you?" He decided to grab another.

Quinys Forgedawn

"I've had a dad, that's about it." She shrugged and swirled the liquid around in her glass, head heavy with all that had happened lately. "I've felt attraction, I guess, but never felt a desire to be in a relationship with everyone. Most men are fairly disgusting when they want to be with someone, no offense, and it makes me feel odd. I mean, what's the difference between someone liking you and just wanting you? Is there one?"

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn felt a sense of husbandly honor surge through him as she said her peace. It came to him instantly. "Most men are disgusting when it comes to treating women, and I won't deny that a bit. But the difference between lust and love is bein' in their shoes, lass. If a man, or really any kind of person, is able to see through another person's eyes what it is like to be them it creates a far better understanding of that person. When someone does that with you, and I understand it's hard to find someone who will, their care for you is stronger than anyone else's could possibly be." Valorn looked at the ground for a spell. "They love you, and you love them. And it grieves all t'hell when they're gone." He didn't want to burden Quinys with his problems, as he didn't want to burden anyone, but he was fucking drunk.

Quinys Forgedawn

"Adonis is the only person who's ever loved me, and I don't remember ever loving anyone but him. Maybe I was sheltered too much? I don't know, I don't care, I had a good childhood for the most part and I don't care what the others say." Quin sipped her drink and rubbed her head for a moment, letting it all sink in. She had never been loved by anyone except the man she had chosen this group over, dear gods what had she done? Now what? Where did she go knowing that she had betrayed the only person who thought she was worth anything?

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn realized this was a harsh memory for her. He didn't want to pry. Well, theoretically. But he also didn't have much conscience left. "Do you still love him? I won't judge you if you are."

Quinys Forgedawn

"Do you love your parents?" Quin finished her glass and ordered a beer, looking into it and deciding how much alcohol would make her sick. Maybe she should go back to Edric's room and let him have his way with her, maybe then she'd feel more than self hatred.

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn instantly realized her condition. "Yes, I do. Any good dwarf does. I understand the man threatened all of our lives, excepting you, but I can tell how important he still is. I hope he stays away like he pledged." Valorn's eyes go numb, and he drinks a sip, looking back at Quinys. "Bavina's birthday is coming up, and I'm not sure what I'm going to do. Every succeeding year, I am just a little less sure. I miss her so much. I hope I can visit her grave soon." Valorn just let it all rush out of his mouth.

Quinys Forgedawn

"Do you have anything of hers, to remember her by? You don't have to be at her grave to honor her. You can just talk to her and live in a way she would like. Would she like you to be like this? Drinking in a dark tavern with a shady wood elf, wishing she were still with you? Or would she rather see you happy and feeling like you're alive again?" Quin pats Valorn's hand and smiles a bit, knowing he was in pain and wanting to let him know it was okay to feel it without letting it overcome him.

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn felt at his chest, making sure it was still there. "Yeah, I have her locket. The one she gave to me before we ever married." Valorn looked sullen again. "I know she wouldn't want me to be like this. She wanted me to go on my own adventures, and find my own path. Well I'm damn well doin' that now, and I still feel like I have no purpose! I don't want to feel like this." Valorn realized he had almost been yelling, and tried to calm himself down. "She wouldn't want me to feel upset. But I do. I wish she were here. I was never the brave one in our marriage."

Quinys Forgedawn

"Then be brave for her, be what she wanted and that'll make her proud." Quin thought briefly about taking her own advice and realized that she was living how Adonis would want if he's not with her. She was miserable, alone, slept with her door bared each night, and had never felt anyone's touch outside of one kiss. She had been successful in being a perfect little angel for him so far, and is that what she wanted? "I've never been with anyone before, is it nice?"

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn felt himself get red. He wasn't going to talk about being intimate with his late wife, even while drunk. "Ehh, uhhh, I can't talk about that. Civil dwarves like us don't make conversation about that stuff. I wouldn't disrespect my wife in life, and I certainly won't do it parted from her. I'm sorry, Quinys." Valorn took a long gulp of his ale. This was his last one, now.

Quinys Forgedawn

"It's okay, it's not like I plan on changing anything any time soon. I just…feel like it's something I should know at some point." Quin finished her drink and stood, leaning on the bar and looking at the ground. Maybe things would change, maybe not, perhaps it would be easier to just go and not look back, or find Adonis and beg him to take her back. "Thanks for drinking with me, even if I'm miserable company."

Valorn Aenethal

Valorn looked towards the stairs, as he started to feel tired. "Absolutely. And you're not miserable company. If anything, I have been. Thanks for comforting me." Valorn pushed back from his stool, and started walking towards his room.

Quinys Forgedawn

Quin headed for her own room and bared the door behind her, sighing and placing her weapons down. She fell face down on the bed and passed out quickly, still in her clothes.

S5E8-QuinysValorn

Phandelver + Storm King and beyond CapitalistPig peramene